A couple jobs, a big ol’ trip and plans for a bigger one. New friends, reunions with old ones and back-to-home family bonding. Early mornings, late nights and fresh air in between. Lots of love and a scary heartbreak.
2008, goodbye. And hello to something new.
“A ‘No’ uttered from the deepest conviction is better than a ‘Yes’ merely uttered to please, or worse, to avoid trouble.”
“I do not want to foresee the future. I am concerned with taking care of the present. I have no control over the moment following.“
About a half mile from home this afternoon and halfway through my go-to cool-down ditty, “The Luckiest” by Ben Folds Five, my iPod died. A little sputter, then kaput.
Without the comforting seclusion of my earbuds, jogging past a couple of teens smoking cigarettes in their car (parked oh so inconspicuously down the road from where one lives) seemed slightly awkward. Their conversation ceased when I came within earshot. We flashed uncomfortable smiles.
A man working out in his yard gave a little wave. A woman got her mail and walked back inside.
And then, a whoop.
“Lord, Jesus!!! What a great day it is!!” a far-off figure yelped, spokes blazing and dirt-caked arms raised in the air. The rest of the neighborhood characters and I looked on perplexed as he and his silver bicycle came closer.
Screeeechhhhhh! He clutched the handlebar brakes hard to catch two baseball hat-wearing guys before they hopped in a Jeep Cherokee. He gave each a high five. Wide eyes, shaking heads and chuckles.
“God is love! Praise Him! A beautiful day!” the man shouted toward me, a crazy grin beckoning me to agree. “Sure is,” I replied with a laugh.
He gave a quick fist-pump, hunkered down to the handlebars, and pounded the pedals with brown leather cowboy boots.
“Yeee hawwww!!”
A few random things I’ve seen lately:
- A pair of chili-pepper boxer shorts hanging from a lamppost outside an apartment downtown
- A near platoon of camo-fied soldiers with giant backpacks jogging Bayshore at sunrise
- An old lady wearing a very wide brimmed hat, full makeup and tennis shoes — also sauntering down Bayshore at sunrise
- A bumper sticker on a big truck: “Guzzlin’ gas and haulin’ ass!!”
- A ridiculously tan old man with a cut-off T-shirt and way-too-short-shorts riding past the University of Tampa on a segway
Same scruffed-up floors, same long line at the water fountain, same raised voice — “Point your toes! Turn out your feet! Long necks!”
Four years later, I’m back at Brucie’s — the dance studio where I spent a large portion of my time from the age of 3 to 18. A hometown internship and free time in the evenings has provided an opportunity for the ultimate blast from the past… and very sore feet.
Between plies and tendus, the girls next to me at the barre talk of pre-calc and boys. These familiar little faces now wear makeup. I feel old.
When the music’s on, it doesn’t matter. We’re all lengthening our backs and swooping our arms from one position to the next. I’m using muscles I forgot existed. For a second, I let my mind go back to stuff I used to worry about — homework and college applications, weekend plans and crushes. All that time spent looking out the same big window, with scattered thoughts and lots of wondering, and here I am. A little older, slightly wiser and much less flexible. But most of all, grateful that everything has a way of working out.
More chatter about study groups. Tomorrow is picture day. Some guy didn’t call her back last night, and she doesn’t even care. I can’t help but smile.
Nope, nothing’s changed at all.